The humor/satire in this imaginative Creation is also
really and plainly painful to many
Please do note the bottom-line.
But, Hats off to the person who created it.
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National Corruption Institute Of India
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You've all heard of B-Schools. Yes the IIM and related
armada of annually turned out Business School graduates
who all end up working in
companies which I have huge stakes in and yes the
B-SCHOOL is also a
distinct brand of business teaching that allows
Professor (Name Edited) to dare aspiring B-Schoolers
to think beyond the IIM's and in
return be rewarded with laptops
(on a first come first serve basis)
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The future of this country lies not in the B-School
but rather in
the C-SCHOOL where C stands for CORRUPTION.
Apart from this Legendary Investor
the next bunch of highest money makers are
our politicians.
And politicians need to excel in the art and science
of corruption to
become successful politicians. Therefore I forecast a
C-School boom
much like the B-School boom so that aspiring
politicians can learn the
proper ways of corruption.
But no matter how many C-schools come up, none will
ever match the
class and academic scholarship of the World's Best
C-School:
THE NATIONAL CORRUPTION INSTITUTE
OF INDIA (NCII).
Our most prestigious politicians like (Names Edited)
and more recently
(Names Edited)
among many others have passed out with
distinguished honours
from the hallowed grounds of the NCII.
If you too want to become a successful politician then
you must join the NCII.
The WORLD'S GREATEST AND ONLY C-SCHOOL!
Just check out their
new advertisement for aspiring C-School applicants:
National Corruption Institute Of India (NCII) -
Affiliated To Indian Parliament
Listed on the World Corruption Index
as the World's Best C-School
Invites Applications for
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3 Years Undergraduate Bachelors Degree in Corruption (BC).
Candidates successfully completing BC
will be eligible for
2 Yrs Masters Course (MC) in specialised fields
e.g. tele-communications, sports, housing etc
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OUR COMPREHENSIVE SYLLABUS INCLUDES:-
Financial Theory and Practice
* Transfer of funds through HAWALA
for creation of MASS GHOTALA
* FINANCIAL NETWORKING -
Movement of money through well engineered networks
between State Party Units and Central Party Unit.
* Solicitation methods to increase donations towards Party Fund.
* Theory and application of Popular BRIBE concepts and
methods like 'Chai Pani', 'Parcel', 'Change', 'Gift Box' ,
'Color TV', 'Foreign Trip' and the ever popular 'Children's School Fees'
Public Relations (PR) and Media Management
* Learn how to be MISQUOTED BY THE MEDIA.
* Learn to say the right things to be QUOTED OUT OF CONTEXT.
* Excellent training in PARTY SPOKESMANOLOGY.
Learn how to argue on TV with other Party people on TV like
Professor (Name Edited) and Professor (Name Edited).
* Develop public gestures like NAMASTE and HAND WAVING.
* Learn the art of proving all allegations as
"BASELESS AND POLITICALLY MOTIVATED"
* Effectively refute STING OPERATIONS.
Advanced course in proving
that VIDEO FOOTAGE IS FALSE AND MANIPULATED.
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Law and Order Module:
In this module you will learn how to:
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* Commit MURDER and RAPE.
* Bring LOCAL POLICE under your control.
* Get BAIL super fast if you are ever arrested.
* Apply and get speedy ANTICIPATORY BAIL so you don't
get arrested in the first place!
* FIGHT ELECTIONS FROM JAIL! Special lectures in this
chapter by visiting Professors (Names Edited)!
* You will get expert lectures on how to pretend
illness when arrested and lead comfortable life in hospital till
bail is granted.
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Advanced Riotology
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* Methods to build your own storage houses for HOCKEY
STICKS AND WEAPONS to engineer riots.
* Identify and develop your own fuel depots for easy
and widespread dispersal of
RIOT FRIENDLY PETROL TANKERS
* Form effective partnerships with local liquor stores
for easy procurement of 'DESI DARU' to get rioters high and
ensure awesome rioting!
* Full study in CONTEMPORARY BUS BURNING. New age
exciting methods
for INSTANTANEOUS BUS COMBUSTION.
* Introductory Kashmir method of inciting riots
through STONE THROWING.
* Actual rioting demonstrations under the expert
tutelage of Professor (Name Edited).
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Gain Extensive Knowledge From Our Faculty
Of World Class Professors
Special Courses In:
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* '2G SPECTRUM - A Telecommunications Perspective' By
Professors (Names Edited)
* 'Flat Taking From Army Jawan' By Professor (Name Edited)
* 'The Correct Standard of Cleanliness'
By Professor Name Edited (of CW Games fame)
* 'Sports Medal or No Medal,
In Corruption Always Get Gold Medal'
By Professor Name Edited
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* 'Application of Corruption on
Non Human Species -
Stealing Money for Cattle Fodder' By Professor (Name Edited)
* 'Building A Corridor for The Taj Mahal Can Cost More
Money Than Building The Taj Mahal Itself'
By Professor (Name Edited).
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And Many Many More!!
SO FORGET B-SCHOOL.
BE COOL, JOIN C-SCHOOL.
EAST OR WEST - NCII IS THE BEST.
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Admission open - Limited seats
(thru back-door only and to highest bidders,
transparency guaranteed)
No qualification required, politicians preferred - no
age limit, no sex bar - placement guaranteed - RUSH NOW
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